Stepping Stones

By Ellen H. Brown

Our lives are constantly changing. Yet, so often, we resist change, rather than embracing it. That’s true of my clients, whether they’re dealing with job loss or a serious illness, or any life transition, for that matter. And it’s certainly true of me, too, sometimes.

Recently, I was reminded of that fact, when I watched, with sadness, as the golden autumn leaves in our backyard twirled their way to the ground.

But why was I so sad? I mean, it’s still autumn. There are still plenty leaves on the trees, and that crisp autumn scent I love continues to permeate the air. Technically, winter won’t be ushered in for another two months. But with each leaf that falls and every cool night, I’m reminded that the end is near.

As much as I’d like to embrace change, sometimes I cling to the things I love. But when I do, I miss out on the opportunities right in front of me. So, I’m sad that winter is coming, but winter isn’t even here yet.

When I see the words laid out on the page, I realize how silly it sounds to concern myself with a season that hasn’t even arrived yet. Why not enjoy autumn while it’s still here?

Perhaps the great spiritual teacher, Eckhart Tolle, says it best: “All you really need to do is accept this moment fully. You are then at ease in the here and now and at ease with yourself.”His advice isn’t always easy to put into practice. Yet it rings true, whether our goal is to accept the coming of winter, the loss of a job, or a serious illness.

Acceptance, of course, is a process, and I certainly don’t mean to equate the ending of autumn with the loss of a loved one. As a coach, I never hurry acceptance along. Because grieving our losses is SO important.

But the longer we resist accepting what is, the longer we feel the pain and the harder it is to enjoy what we DO have in our lives.

We always have a choice about whether to resist or go with the flow. So I can choose to resist the coming of winter until the first spring flowers sprout from the ground. But if I do, I’ll miss out on autumn and winter, and all the beauty that the seasons have to offer, and I won’t be living in the present moment. Enjoying what is.

The truth is winter is NOT my favorite season. I’m not a fan of the biting cold or bundling up. And driving in the snow? Well, given the choice, I’d rather pass, if you don’t mind!

But I DO enjoy watching the snowflakes gliding their way through the air, on their journey to places unknown.  And when I don’t have to trek across town, I enjoy curling up by the window, with a good book, taking in the glitter of a nice ice storm.

I also like the quiet of winter. The way it invites us to travel inward and be still, like the stately sycamore in our front yard.

But before I get ahead of myself, I’m going to stop thinking about winter and enjoy autumn. Because as I look out my office window, the leaves on the Maple are glowing. And our yard is a gorgeous masterpiece, flecked with gold and orange, crimson and sienna.

Yes, today, I’m going to enjoy what is. Because all I have is the present moment.

How do you deal with change?

What might you be resisting in YOUR life?

How does that resistance affect you?

I’d love to hear what you have to say. Please join in the conversation by leaving a comment (by scrolling down) here on Stepping Stones.

Are you recovering from job loss or dealing with the death of a loved one? Or are you struggling with another life transition? If so, I’d love to support on your new life journey. Visit my website at http://tinyurl.com/npmube to sign up for an introductory session or a coaching package that’s right for you. Since coaching sessions are conducted by phone, I can work with clients anywhere in the world.

Ellen H. Brown is a certified professional coach based in Cleveland, Ohio.