By Ellen Brown

They say that grieving is a lonely process, and if you’re grieving the death of a loved one, you may feel all alone with your feelings. But it doesn’t have to be that way. There are support groups in your community and online that you can join, and people there who will understand what you’re going through.

I recently found that to be true, when I participated in a bereavement group through the Hospice of the Western Reserve, after my Mom died. Over the years, I’ve been a part of a number of support groups and often encourage coaching clients to do the same. That’s because there is something comforting about being in the company of people who are traveling a similar path. There is an unspoken understanding, an invisible bond.

In any case, this wonderful bereavement group was a sanctuary away from the bustle of everyday life, a place where it was OK to be where we were at in our healing process, where no one judged us for our tears or our anger or our sense of relief. Groups like these are quite a gift in our crazy busy culture, which is all about hurrying up and getting “over” our grief.

It was a comfort to be embraced by this circle of new friends, where no one asked “aren’t you over that yet?” or told me “you should feel grateful that your mother is finally at peace.” It was a place where we could share our stories and our ways of coping or choose, instead, to rest in our silence. It was also a comfortable venue to learn about the process of grief, and test drive different tools to help us heal.

I  tell you all this, in case you, too, are grieving a loss. Because, whether you’re dealing with the death of a loved one, the loss of your job, or the decline of your health, you don’t have to go it alone.  If you need a little help, consider joining a bereavement group or a job club or a support group for dealing with a chronic disease such as cancer or diabetes.

And never forget that reaching out for help is strength, not a weakness!

So how about YOU? How have support groups helped you? I’d love to hear what you have to say. Please leave a comment here on Stepping Stones.

Are you dealing with a challenging life transition? If so, I’d love to help out. Visit my website at http://www.ellen-brown.com to sign up for an introductory coaching session or a coaching package that’s right for you. Since coaching sessions are conducted by phone, I can work with clients anywhere in the world.

Ellen Brown is a certified professional coach based in Cleveland, OH.

By Ellen Brown

In our culture, we’re taught – subtly or not so subtly – that certain emotions are better than others. Joy is “good.” Anger and sadness are “bad.” Guilt is pointless. And shame is, well, shameful, and best swept under the bed.

Often, these emotional dos and don’ts are reinforced by our families, when we’re growing up. Our parents might have told us that “boys don’t cry” or hissed “I’ll give you something to be sad about” from time to time.

Given those circumstances, it’s no surprise that we sometimes stuff those feelings we’ve been told are “bad.” But when we do, those feelings often reappear in the form of physical symptoms such as stomach aches or insomnia. Worse yet, they may lead to chronic conditions such as heart disease or cancer.

Or sometimes, those feelings leak out in inappropriate ways, because let’s face it: they’re always seeking a target, whether it’s someone from the past who wronged us or someone in the here and now we love with all our heart. I’ve seen this not so pretty leakage occur in my own life, and in the lives of my coaching clients, whether they’re moving onto a new job or a new relationship.

When we don’t release the feelings associated with our losses, whether we’ve been laid off or we’re dealing with the death of our spouse or significant other, we carry those feelings into that next phase of our life and often heap them onto someone new or familiar. And that is NOT a loving way of moving through life …

So I’m here to tell you that when you’re dealing with any kind of loss it is SO important to feel and release all of your feelings, whether you’re experiencing sadness or anger or guilt or regret or any other emotion that bubbles to the surface. As far as I’m concerned, there aren’t any “bad” feelings. Some feelings may feel more comfortable than others. But feelings aren’t “good” or “bad.” They just are.

When we give feelings their time in the sun, acknowledging them, expressing them, and releasing them, they move through us, instead of getting stuck inside and gunking up our lives.

In case you’re thinking “yeah this all sounds great but how do I do that,” here are some ideas:

• Talk it out – Find someone you can trust, whether that’s a close friend who can listen, without judgment, or a trusted therapist or coach.
• Write it out – Journaling about how you’re feeling can go a long way toward acknowledging and releasing your feelings. Of course, “journaling” is one of those words with many meanings, so what I mean by journaling is sitting down with a notebook daily (or several times a week), getting quiet, tuning into your feelings and writing about what you’re feeling, without censoring or editing your words. To help you get started, ask yourself, “how or what am I feeling right now?”
• Act it out – Sometimes, emotion calls for taking action. And for the record, I’m talking about taking action in a safe and reasonable way. Expressing your anger can be a positive experience. But not when you’re hurting yourself or someone else! Some possible ways of expressing or releasing your anger include going for a run or a brisk walk, writing a letter to the person you’re angry at (just because you write it doesn’t necessarily mean you want to send it), playing tennis or handball, closing the windows in your home or car (while it’s parked) and screaming at the top of your lungs, or simply allowing yourself to cry when you’re feeling sad.

As always, there are no one-size-fits-all solutions. The point is to find some healthy ways of expressing and releasing your feelings that work for you.

I’d love to hear what you have to say about the ideas in this blog post. Please leave a comment here on Stepping Stones.

Are you dealing with job loss, the death of a loved one, or another challenging life transition? If so, I’d love to help out. Visit my website at http://www.ellen-brown.com to sign up for an introductory coaching session or a coaching package that’s right for you. Since coaching sessions are conducted by phone, I can work with clients anywhere in the world.

Ellen Brown is a certified professional coach based in Cleveland, OH.

By Ellen Brown

Lately, I’ve been hankering to try something new. To experiment. To explore. To get out more. This all makes perfect sense since I haven’t had much time or energy to play in the past year, a year that began with the slow decline and death of my father-in-law last August and ended with the passing of my mom in July.

During that time, I didn’t have much energy or a whole lot of time to get out and have fun.  But today, while I am still grieving my losses, I’ve lately noticed a stirring within to try something new. And it feels kind of exciting. Like the way it felt years ago in the fall, when school started, and the air smelled crisp and full of possibilities.

Thankfully, life is serendipitous, so when I started thinking about how it would be nice to get out more, a friend of mine told me about a new book club that’s forming next month. I also heard about a study group that’s centered around the spiritual teachings of Eckhart Tolle and his book, the Power of Now. Though my husband and I have only attended the group a few times, we already feel at home there.

I don’t pretend to be “over” the loss of my loved ones, and I still carry plenty of Kleenex for those weepy moments that seem to spring out of nowhere, when I hear a sad song or smell a familiar scent of perfume that reminds me of my mom. But I’m feeling more hopeful and energetic. And ready to try something new. And for that I’m grateful.

How about YOU? Have you found it helpful to try something new when you’re dealing with loss?

I’d love to hear what you have to say. Please leave a comment here on Stepping Stones by scrolling down to the bottom of the page.

Are you dealing with job loss, the death of a loved one, or another challenging life transition? If so, I’d love to help out. Visit my website at http://www.ellen-brown.com to sign up for an introductory coaching session or a coaching package that’s right for you. Since coaching sessions are conducted by phone, I can work with clients anywhere in the world.

Ellen Brown is a certified professional coach based in Cleveland, OH.

By Ellen Brown

When you’re dealing with a difficult life transition, such as divorce or job loss, do you sometimes beat yourself up because you can’t seem to  “get over it and move on?” Many of my clients fall into that familiar pattern, and I’ve certainly done the same from time to time. The problem is that scolding ourselves only makes matters worse.

Such was the case with my client, Josh (not his real name), a young and talented attorney who was laid off during the economic downturn. Josh had solid credentials, a great resume, and a gentle presence that made him a delight to be around. But Josh had been out of work for nearly nine months, and he had begun to see that long lapse as a character flaw. Sometimes, in our sessions, he would berate himself for being out of work, which only made him feel worse. That, in itself made it harder for Josh to sell himself in his job interviews. Over time, I helped him see that treating himself more gently was actually more helpful than beating himself up.

But it wasn’t easy, because Josh was like many of us who believe that a swift kick in the you know where is the best motivating force in helping us move forward. And why not? That belief is instilled in us by parents and coaches and bosses who tell us to “just buck up” or “stop your bellyaching” or “quit your complaining and get on with your life.” But comments like these only heap on the shame and shame, while sometimes paralyzing, is rarely motivating.

To me, the best medicine for dealing with a difficult transition is to be gentler with yourself. Why? Because when you’re going through a transition, you’re already in a compromised state. You may be feeling sad or angry or scared. Or you may be confused about what your future holds. When you’re navigating this rocky terrain, what you need is a best friend who’s cheering you on. Not a bully, threatening to knock you down.

If you’re wondering how you could be gentler with yourself, for starters, you could:

• Stop yelling at yourself and treat yourself with the same love and respect that you’d show a good friend
• Allow yourself to “be” with your feelings instead of pushing them away. This will allow your feelings to move through you in a natural way, instead of getting stuck.
• Remind yourself of your strengths and successes everyday
• Counteract your negative self talk, such as “I’m a loser” with positive messages you believe (e.g. “I’m a valuable employee”)
• Take some time to reflect on your new circumstances through journaling, meditation, or spending time in nature
• Balance out this tough time with enjoyable activities – in whatever form that takes for you
• Remember that  nothing lasts forever and “this too shall pass.”

So, do you tend to beat yourself up, or are you able to treat yourself with gentleness when you’re going through a difficult transition?

What keeps you from treating yourself more gently?

I’d love to hear what you have to say. Please leave a comment here on Stepping Stones by scrolling down to the bottom of the page.

Are you dealing with job loss, the death of a loved one, or another challenging life transition? If so, I’d love to help out. Visit my website at http://www.ellen-brown.com to sign up for an introductory coaching session or a coaching package that’s right for you. Since coaching sessions are conducted by phone, I can work with clients anywhere in the world.

If you’d like to hear more about the benefits of being gentle with yourself, check out one of our recent episodes of Dialogues with Dignity, in which we discuss that very topic: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/dialogueswithdignity/2010/08/05/being-gentle-versus-working-hard

Ellen Brown is a certified professional coach based in Cleveland, OH.

By Ellen Brown

When we’re dealing with difficult life transitions like job loss or the death of a loved one, it’s not uncommon for us to focus a little too much on the past and the future. We may ruminate about the day our supervisor delivered the bad news. Or we may obsess about how we’re going to make ends meet without the help of our life partner.

Experiencing these feelings is natural, and I certainly wouldn’t suggest that we try to bury them. But there’s something to be said for balance and bringing ourselves back to the present moment, and being with “what is” today. At a workshop I recently attended on Complicated Grief, the featured speaker, a grief counselor for the Hospice of the Western Reserve, highlighted that point.

The presenter talked about how people who are faced with the sudden death of a loved one, experience a great deal of pain, and need to learn how to live with the pain, rather than pushing it away or self medicating themselves with alcohol or drugs. She recommended a number of helpful strategies, including staying in the present moment, which she said helps ground us in our current reality and is the key to bringing more joy into our lives.

What she described really resonated with me and surprised me.  While I’ve been practicing the art of living in the present moment (sometimes known as mindfulness) for years, with the help of books by great spiritual teachers such as Eckhart Tolle and Thich Nhat Hanh, I hadn’t really thought about the connection she was discussing. I hadn’t really considered how we often live more in the past and future, when we’re navigating difficult life transitions. But it’s true, and I’ve certainly witnessed that tendency in myself and in many of my coaching clients.

It’s understandable that many of us feel anxious and in pain when we focus on our regrets about the past and our fears of the future. But when we shift our attention back to the here and now, and listen, really listen to the Robin singing just outside our window or allow ourselves to savor the delicious meal set before us, we often feel more peaceful and happy.

By the way, I’m not suggesting that mindfulness is a happy pill. But it can be a helpful tool to have in your toolbox. So, if you’re dealing with a difficult transition and notice yourself slipping into the past or future a little too often, you may want to try this exercise to help you return to the present moment:

Take a few deep breaths, noticing the rise and fall of your belly. Feel your feet against floor. Look around you. Notice what you see. Reach out and touch something and notice how it feels.  Become aware of the sounds around you. You’re now in the present moment.

Please keep in mind that learning to live in the present moment is a process, so be gentle with yourself, when you notice your mind drifting. Then take a deep breath and bring yourself back to the here and now.

If you’re going through a tough time, in what way would it be helpful for you to live in the here and now more often?

How has mindfulness helped you in your life?

I’d love to hear what you have to say. Please leave a comment here on Stepping Stones by scrolling down.

Are you dealing with job loss, the death of a loved one, or another challenging life transition? If so, I’d love to help out. Visit my website at http://www.ellen-brown.com to sign up for an introductory coaching session or a coaching package that’s right for you. Since coaching sessions are conducted by phone, I can work with clients anywhere in the world.

Ellen Brown is a certified professional coach, based in Cleveland, OH.

By Ellen Brown

As I often tell clients and friends (and anyone else who will listen), meditation can help us weather some of life’s toughest storms. While it’s hardly a magic bullet, meditation can help us feel more relaxed and peaceful, and medical studies have suggested that such practices may lessen anxiety, depression, and insomnia, which many of us experience during difficult times.

I, personally, don’t know where I’d be without meditation. It’s one of those practices I’ve been committed to for years, and I can’t imagine giving it up.

A few months ago, my meditation practice was a God send, when I was watching my beloved father-in-law, John, who had Alzheimer’s disease and terminal cancer, slip away a little bit more each day. Every day when my husband and I returned from visiting John at the nursing home, it was so comforting to pull up my meditation cushion and just sit, watching my thoughts drift by like clouds in the sky.

On some days, my experience wasn’t quite that serene. But I did my best to accept what was happening and allowed myself to be with whatever feelings emerged … And while my meditations didn’t change the fact that John was dying or in pain sometimes, my daily practice helped ease MY pain.

If you’re interested in meditation but believe it’s too time consuming or difficult, not to worry. Meditation doesn’t have to be about sitting on a cushion for hours on end. You can decide how much time to devote to the practice, whether that’s five minutes or an hour. And you can even sit in a chair, if you find it more comfortable than a cushion.

Meditation can take many forms, including:

• Auditory meditations, involving music or guided meditation
• Visual meditations, which may involve the creation of mandalas or other works of art
• Traditional forms that involve sitting still with your eyes closed and following your breath or observing your thoughts, without judgment, as they pass through your mind
• Moving meditations such as yoga, dance or walking

One of my favorite books on the topic of meditation is Kat Tansey’s Choosing to Be. This beautifully written book revolves around a wise Maine Coon cat, his kitten muse, and author Kat Tansey, who take the reader on a challenging and often times amusing journey from the disorienting haze of depression to the freedom and clarity of Buddha mind. I often recommend the book to my coaching clients who are dealing with difficult life transitions, because it’s inspiring and lightened with humor and reminds us that we have the power and strength to transcend whatever we’re facing.

So, how has meditation helped YOU, as you’ve dealt with a difficult life transition, or how do you think it COULD help?

What kind of beliefs do you have about meditation that may be preventing you from giving it a try?

What are your favorite books (or audio resources) on meditation?

I’d love to hear what you have to say. Please join in the conversation by leaving a comment here on Stepping Stones.

Are you dealing with a challenging life transition? If so, I’d love to help out. Visit my website at http://tinyurl.com/yc7meqo to sign up for an introductory coaching session or a coaching package that’s right for you. Since coaching sessions are conducted by phone, I can work with clients anywhere in the world.

Ellen Brown is a certified professional coach, based in Cleveland, OH.

By Ellen Brown

Years, ago, when I was healing from child sexual abuse, I found it SO important to be around people (and books and movies) who could inspire me, as I traveled the journey from victim to survivor (ultimately becoming a thriver). Because navigating that transition could be grueling, and sometimes, I’d wonder whether I’d make it through the darkness and into the light. But when I met other survivors and read books about people who had traveled similar paths, I felt hopeful that I, too, would heal.

Back then, one of the people who inspired me the most was my therapist, Susan, who became a counselor, after transcending her own abuse. While she never talked about what had happened to her (thank goodness!), it gave me great strength to know that she had healed and been able to help other survivors like me. She had made it through the storm, and that gave me great hope. Because if she made it through the storm, then maybe I could too!

During that time, I also read a number of inspirational books by survivors who had overcome abuse, as well as the proverbial bible for survivors of child sexual abuse: The Courage to Heal by Ellen Bass and Laura Davis. That book, which was an emblem of hope and healing for me, offered a plethora of healing exercises, as well as numerous examples of people who had overcome their abuse. The authors, themselves, who are both survivors, were also a great source of inspiration. Though I never met them, I felt inexplicably connected with them, as I made my way through their 600-page tome. Sometimes, it seemed as though they were right there beside me, cheering me on, saying “you can do it, girlfriend: keep going. Don’t let anyone stop you.”

At that time, there were only a couple of websites you could visit to commiserate with other survivors, but today there are tons of online resources for people dealing with abuse and any other transition imaginable.

Today, as a coach, I encourage my clients to seek out an extra dose of inspiration, whether they are healing from child sexual abuse, dealing with the loss of a loved one, or navigating any other challenging life transition. While I certainly provide them with plenty of encouragement, as their coach, I believe there’s no such thing as too much inspiration!

Below is a short list of inspirational resources (listed by transitions) I often recommend to clients who are dealing with difficult transitions. But please don’t be limited by this list.  Explore the Internet and your local library and bookstores to find some resources that resonate with you.

Inspirational Resources

Transcending Childhood Abuse

The Courage to Heal: A Guide for Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse, By Laura Davis and Ellen Bass. (See description above).

I Never Told Anyone: Writings by Women Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse– Featuring a number of moving testimonies by survivors of child sexual abuse—edited  by Ellen Bass, co-author of The Courage to Heal.

Freedom’s Just Another Word, By Dan L. Hays – An inspiring memoir, set in Houston, Texas in 1987, about healing, hope, and forgiveness in the wake of hismemories of childhood abuse.

Minute to Freedom: http://www.radiokevin.com/minutetofreedom.htm – One minute audio segments by author and speaker Dan L. Hays that help people transcend their difficult childhoods, one minute at a time.

Dealing with Illness and Healing

Waking: A Memoir of Trauma and Transcendence, By Matthew Sanford – An inspiring story about hope and healing that chronicles the journey of Matthew  Sanford — from when he awakens in the intensive care unit of a hospital after a car accident that killed his father and sister —  to becoming a paralyzed yoga teacher and founder of a nonprofit organization.

Choosing to Be: Lessons in Living from a Feline Zen Master, By Kat Tansey – A wonderfully inspiring book that revolves around a wise Maine Coon cat named Poohbear Degoonacoon, his kitten muse Catzenbear, and author Kat Tansey, as they take the reader on a challenging and oft times amusing journey from the disorienting haze of depression to the freedom and clarity of Buddha mind.

Insomnia Relief Recipes, By Kat Tansey http://www.insomniareliefrecipes.com/

– This unique sleep program, created by Kat Tansey, is the result of the author’s personal quest to overcome insomnia. After spending many months researching the roots of insomnia and the nature of sleep, she was able to create her own unique recipe for regaining her confidence and learning how to get the restful, restorative sleep she needed, no matter what the circumstances. After realizing how pervasive insomnia truly is, she decided to develop Insomnia Relief Recipes to help others get a good night’s sleep. She used everything she learned from her research to put together a comprehensive program, complete with audios and videos, that will help you create your own, customized Insomnia Relief Recipe.

ShareWIK: http://www.sharewik.com –- A warm and inspiring online community in which experts dispense information about health and healing, regular columnists share their experience and knowledge, and people on the path to wellness gather to share what they know.

Dealing with the Loss of a Loved One

From Heartbreak to Happiness, By Aurora Winter – An intimate diary that reveals a single mother’s journey of tragedy and triumph after the sudden death of her 33-year-old husband.

The Year of Magical Thinking, By Joan Didion –  Author Joan Didion chronicles the year following the death of her beloved husband, fellow writer John Gregory Dunne, from a massive heart attack in 2003, while the couple’s only daughter, Quintana, lay unconscious in a nearby hospital suffering from pneumonia and septic shock. While some may find this book less than inspiring, because of its rawness, I found it particularly inspiring and cathartic.

The Grief Recovery Handbook: The Action Program for Moving Beyond Death Divorce, and Other Losses, By John W. James and Russell Friedman – A wonderful guidebook to help you navigate your loss and make you realize that time does NOT heal all wounds, but that healing is possible, if you take the necessary action. The book was inspired by the authors’ personal losses.

General Inspiration

Inspiremetoday.com, By Gail Goodwin: http://www.inspiremetoday.com - – Free daily inspiration, designed to remind you that you have the power to create anything in your life you desire. A great way to start your day.

E-couragement,– Daily encouragement delivered to your email inbox by Thomas Waterhouse, a counselor in Tampa Bay, Florida, who believes that “Hearts filled with courage can rise to any challenge.” Sign up here: http://www.simpleencouragement.com/eCouragements

SO who or what inspires you the most?

What are your favorite inspirational books, movies or websites, and why?

Are you dealing with a challenging life transition? If so, I’d love to help out. Visit my website at http://tinyurl.com/yc7meqo to sign up for an introductory coaching session or a coaching package that’s right for you. Since coaching sessions are conducted by phone, I can work with clients anywhere in the world.

Ellen Brown is a certified professional coach, based in Cleveland, OH.

Note: This was the second in a series of posts on inspiration. In my first post, I talked about the importance of surrounding yourself with inspiring, positive messages during difficult life transitions. And today, as promised, I discussed some other types of inspiration, designed to provide you with hope as you travel this new life passage.

Note: This Thanksgiving Day post is dedicated to the memory of my dear father-in-law, John Stephen Erdie, who passed away peacefully on November 8, three days before his 86^th birthday.

By Ellen H. Brown

If you’re dealing with the recent death of a loved one, I don’t need to tell you that the holidays can be a bit emotional. There’s no denying it: someone you loved is gone. And their absence can leave a big void at the dinner table, especially on holidays like Thanksgiving. You may feel sad that they’re gone, or angry that they were “taken away,” or you may be experiencing a whole host of other feelings, depending on your relationship with that person.

I’m personally feeling a little sad today, because my beloved father-in-law, John, passed away a few weeks ago. But one of the things I’m doing to ease my pain is making a list of the things I’m thankful for about John. Because I believe that if I remember what I loved about him most, I can balance my sadness with gratitude, and the day won’t be as painful, as we gather together as a family.

So here’s what I loved most about my dear father-in-law

1. His powerful presence and naturally sweet dispositon.
2. The way he was able to warm up a room with his smile even at the end …
3. The way he played the perfect host.
4. How he always put family first.
5. His peaceful way of “being” in the world.
6. The generous, loving way he lived his life.
7. The way he always looked for the very best in everyone, and almost always found it.
8. His abundant love for animals, large and small.
9. His quirky sense of humor.
10. His pure essence of love, which will forever be with us.

I hope you’ll consider creating your own gratitude list or find your own way to honor the memory of YOUR loved one.

If you’ve recently lost a loved one, what did you love most about him or her?

How can you keep his or her memory alive during the holidays and forever?

I’d love to hear what you have to say. Please join in the conversation by leaving a comment, here, on Stepping Stones (by scrolling down to the end of the post).

Are you dealing the death of a loved one? Or are you struggling with another life transition? If so, I’d love to help out. Visit my website at http://tinyurl.com/npmube to sign up for an introductory session or a coaching package that’s right for you. Since coaching sessions are conducted by phone, I can work with clients anywhere in the world.

Ellen H. Brown is a certified professional coach based in Cleveland, Ohio.

By Ellen H. Brown

In our culture, death is personified as a stealthy stalker, to be avoided at all costs. So it’s no wonder that many of us hate thinking about death, let alone making friends with this dark and devious character. But what if we COULD make friends with death, or at least make peace with this final life transitions?

For some inexplicable reason, I’ve always been fascinated by the topic of death, and since my father-in-law was recently diagnosed with terminal cancer and given 3-6 months to live, the topic has definitely been on my mind, lately.

So I was excited when my favorite yoga center, The Atma Center, recently offered a workshop on yoga and death.  What was even more inspiring was that the room was packed with people interested in learning about the topic. When our instructor opened up the workshop by telling us she was going to talk about making friends with death, I was SO THERE.  Sometimes it’s just refreshing to hear someone talk about a topic that so few people can stand to discuss.

I won’t attempt to cover the finer points of the workshop here, but one of the biggest takeaways for me was this: making friends with death is a choice. If we live our lives in the present moment, in an honest, giving, gentle way that’s in service to other people, we’ll have fewer regrets and less trepidation about death when the end is near. And if we come to know who we truly are and become more evolved, spiritually speaking, we will face this final transition with far less fear.

I don’t mean to oversimplify this topic or imply that anyone SHOULD feel this way or that about death. I, personally, just like the idea of talking about death and making peace with this final life transition, since we’re all going to die at some point –whether we like it or not.

While I don’t plan to die anytime soon, I’ve had friends and relatives who have lost their lives to terminal illnesses, heart attacks and auto accidents when they were in their prime. So I know there are no guarantees that I’ll live a long life …

For me, making friends with death is a process, and part of that journey involves exploration and reflection. Toward that end, I recently, began reading The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying, a classic spiritual text packed with inspiring stories and nuggets of wisdom.

I imagine that that exploration might take awhile. So far, I’m still thinking about inviting death to the proverbial party.

While I’d like to believe that if I were diagnosed with a terminal disease tomorrow t I’d handle it with grace, I truthfully have no idea how I’d react. Maybe I’d be as terrified as the next person, fighting for my life even after all medical solutions had been exhausted.

But I hope not. When my time comes, I hope I can let go and be grateful for leading a rich and fulfilling life. Not perfect. Not without its flaws. But pretty darn good!

So how about YOU? When you think about death, what thoughts or feelings emerge for you?

How has the death of a friend or loved one changed your perspective on death?

How would you approach life differently, if you were to make friends with death?

I’d love to hear what you have to say. Please join in the conversation by leaving a comment (by scrolling down) here on Stepping Stones.

Are you dealing with a serious illness or the death of a loved one? Or are you struggling with another life transition? If so, I’d love to help you navigate this challenging transition. Visit my website at http://tinyurl.com/npmube to sign up for an introductory session or a coaching package that’s right for you. Since coaching sessions are conducted by phone, I can work with clients anywhere in the world.

Ellen H. Brown is a certified professional coach based in Cleveland, Ohio.